Dane Owner's Checklist



You know you are a Great Dane owner when...

DANE OWNER'S CHECKLIST
©1998-2008 Ginnie Saunders.
All rights reserved.

  • My Great Dane has ARTHRITIS.
    Does yours?

    We tried various brands of "glucosamine with chondriotin" pills on our elderly Great Dane, Merlin, and he didn't get the relief we were looking for – until we switched to a special LIQUID formulation.

    I highly recommend a liquid glucosamine with chondroitin formula to anyone whose dog is suffering from arthritis or hip dysplasia. Liquid formulations offer a much faster and more efficient absorption rate compared to pills.

    Merlin, who recently celebrated his 10th birthday, is feeling much better now, and I'm completely sold on the product!
                          — Ginnie Saunders

    Click here to learn more

    your friends refer to your dog as the "Great Pain"

  • your birdbath doubles as a water dish

  • you are still buying vans long after the kids have graduated from college

  • you're known at the local Home Depot hardware store as "the guy with the Dog Project"

  • you walk your dog and people cross the street to avoid you

  • every knick-knack in the house resides above the 5 foot mark

  • you hand out slobber clothes to your guests when they arrive

  • you purchased an extra sofa just for the dogs

  • your dog knows how to open the bathroom door (but he never closes it)

  • you have to explain to a guest why she just sat down on a wet toilet seat

  • you are covered with bruises and no one calls the police

  • someone is following too closely and you want them to back off so you have your dog stand up – they drop back 10 car lengths

  • you got a speeding ticket because your dog's foot was on the accelerator

  • guests tell your dog to "sit," and he/she immediately sits – on them

  • the pet food distributor delivers directly to your home and the dog food is delivered by 3/4 ton vehicles

  • you show pictures of yourself next to your dog and people say "you were sitting down, right?"

  • your dog uses your old station wagon as his dog house because he's figured out how to open the doors and let himself in for a nap

  • you wish someone would make a rawhide bone that would last more than 5 minutes

  • your dog agrees, and he starts in on the pillars supporting your porch

  • you have to explain to the insurance adjuster that those holes in your home's pillars are not termite damage

  • you walk your dog and someone asks you, "Is that a Dalmatian on steriods?"

  • regular doggie nail clippers don't make it through one paw

  • you look at the 18" feed stands they sell in the wholesale catalogs and wonder when they are going to get smart and make a 30" version

  • you stay out of the woods during hunting season, and you buy your dog an orange vest to wear whenever he goes outside

  • when other dogs see your dog, they are confused as to just what exactly "it" is

  • you have considered x-rays or lost a toenail after the dog stepped on your foot

  • you tell company to "watch out for land mines" before going into your backyard

  • you go to a feed store you visited just once (last year) and they remember you

  • you can walk your dog comfortably... holding his collar

  • you have not been able to navigate through your house in a straight line for years

  • you have had to explain to your dentist how your teeth get knocked loose (your dog raised his head too fast)

  • you have no window screens left intact on your house

  • your T-shirt has paw prints on the shoulders

  • your cats prefer to eat their meals on the top of the fridge

  • you build a fence to contain your dog, and suddenly you can't see your neighbor's house

  • your dog can palm a basketball – in his mouth

  • your friends stop dropping over to visit

  • your dog can eat a large pig's ear in under 3 minutes

  • the neighborhood kids sneak up to the gate on their way home from school and say "See? I told you so!"

 


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